Levi
by Mak3themcoun1
Summary: USA Graceland One Shots. Follow the Graceland family through these one shots requested by you and written for you.
1. First Cover

First Cover

"You're kidding me right?" Briggs asked Mike as they sat in the phone room of Graceland. Mike had just told Briggs that he was just assigned a cover for a simple FBI sting operation. It was just a simple takedown with a crappy dealer with little to no connections. It was Mike's first cover after the Solano's/ Sulla sex trafficking and drug lord bust. After about two months of sitting in Graceland and even a desk for a week, Mikey-Mike was finally considered well enough to get in the field.

"Alright, fill me in on your cover," Briggs insisted as Mike took a seat across from him. "So simple you even got a fake name! Damn, Levi. Thought your first back would a little bigger than this. What the hell kind of name is this anyways? Two A's, come on man." Paul said aggravated. Yeah, he had his trouble with Mike, and a lot of it, but he knew the kid was an incredible agent. He deserved a better first job than this shit.

"Cover name is Aaron Tveit. He's 31 years old and six feet tall. He was an actor and singer but the tiny unknown show he was on killed him off. No job, no money so he turned into a junkie. Now he's apparently trying to get some _baby_," Mike stopped to smile at the word, remembering on his first sauce night when everyone laughed at him for saying "marijuana." DJ even called him a white boy and Paul said he needed to know the street names for it; thus resulting in Johnny going through all the names for the drug in _reverse _alphabetic order. Mike then said, with copious amounts of cockiness in his voice, "Hey, yo. You got some a dat baby?" and everyone laughing and applauding him. "And he's just scraping by. It should be a quick bust In and out, no questions."

"Alright man. You gonna remember all this shit they listed here for your cover? Lot of ass and nothing to grab, man," Paul criticized and laughed during the first bit.

"I just want to get back into the field. Get my hands on my-"

"I don't even want you to finish that sentence, Mikey!" Charlie shouted. She was hanging out with Briggs today, she had a day off.

"Levi here just got his first cover back, Chuck E' Cheese. Come read this file, Char." Charlie read the file quickly with her brow furrowed before snapping it shut and tossing it onto the desk.

"That's too simple for Mike! That cover is weak. Mike, you can do bet-"

"Thanks Charlie. It's just a simple as shit bust. Half an hour at most," Mike consoled.

"Then you better get the hell outta here and bust someone's ass. Go on man, text us when you're done." Charlie said. Mike nodded and stepped out of the room. He grabbed his keys and looked into the room one last time before leaving. Charlie warned him:

"Don't get shot again, Levi."


	2. Important Author's Note

Hey guys! This is a quick note that I couldn't format onto Levi because of a little glitch. Here it is now and it is important so please read! Levi is a one shot I wrote from a random idea that Mike goes under for a simple mission and I thought it would be funny if his cover's name was Aaron Tveit. Yes, I know they don't use fake names in Graceland and that is addressed. I also want to turn this into a series of one shots so I need you guys to comment prompts in the Review Section! If I really like a prompt I _might_turn it into its own story, maybe. So thank you for reading and remember to comment prompts!

**-Sophia**


	3. Short

_My flash drive didn't save all of my long chapter so I whipped this up for all of you guys! This is something I saw and I thought it'd be a nice, fun, fluffy filler so enjoy if you can? I love you all so much, thanks for reading these one shots. I am also not Jeff Eastin and this is fiction fluff. I want to get to know you all more, too, but we'll get to that in another chappie. Ok, read on, Babes!_

"Mike, this is for the case. I need to get with this small-time dealer so I can take him down! You know this is our job, Babe!" Paige spoke angrily at her boyfriend as he kept running his hand over his face flustered. The blood rushed to his face and he flushed with frustration. How was he supposed to be okay with his incredibly sexy girlfriend walking out of the house with her rear end seeing through her skirt and her cleavage pushed out past her plunging top? Mike slammed his hands down to his sides and stomped over to Paige quickly. His handsome, rugged face was close to hers, his hot, sweet breath prickling the shell of her ear.

"I can't be completely okay with this as hard as I try, Paige. You know that. You're an agent; you take down big bad bitches. But you're _my_ _girlfriend_ and I don't want you near any hands-y dick-wads. Arkin, _you_ I only want all to myself," he spoke into her hair as he slid his hands around her slim waist. He lightly kissed the skin right behind her ear sweetly and ran his fingers through her silky hair.

She still shivered under his breath, damn, would that _ever_ go away? She kind of hoped not. Paige admired how Mike made her feel, smart and badass. Everyone knew she was quite obviously those two things and much more but Warren accentuated them to the best degree. Mike pulled away from her quickly, leaving Paige with a confused expression on her face. He gestured ridiculously to her body and laughed softly.

"What, Mike?"

"Your outfit-it's just-"

"Just what? _It's for the CASE!" _she laughed through her sentence, Mike just cracking her up without trying to.

"YOUR SKIRT IS REALLY SHORT, OKAY!" Mike said loudly. They heard Briggs and Johnny laughing down the hall along with Charlie and Jakes stifling cackles right through the wall. Even Paige herself snorted and pressed her palm to her face in reaction to what Mike had just said. She wouldn't be able to take him seriously for a while, regarding that sentence.

She completely lost it when they heard Johnny shout, "DON'T ACT LIKE YOU DON'T LIKE IT, LEVI!" and then Charlie return with, "JOHNNY! DO _NOT _BE SO DAMN CRUDE! Not in this house!" Mike's face was burning and a flaming red. Everyone sans the embarrassed was laughing their asses off by this point and it got better when Mike cracked a smile and let out a little giggle. Paige stopped laughing only enough to utter a few words:

"THE SKIRT'S SHORT ON PURPOSE!" 


	4. Doubles

_I wrote this from a prompt from a Guest asking for "Sick Mike!" so I tried to deliver. I'm going to write another where Mike gets the flu or some other sickness like that. But for now you have this one-shot of a sick/injured Michael Warren. This also has fluff and PIKE YAAY! Here's this update because you guys deserve one! Btw, this is fiction with fake people created by Jeff Eastin, i.e. not me! Now that that's out of the way, please review and comment prompts either in the comments or my Tumblr ask incaseyouwereasking Okay thank you for reading, we can always talk about Graceland or whatever else via Tumblr or pm on here. Alright, read on, Babes!_

_[Ps- let's pretend that Mike isn't addicted to Oxi! And that Pike is canon and very healthy and happy (Ima be nice to them in this chap.) ALSO! I did a fair amount of research for this chapter so please don't be too harsh on my medical drug terminology =)]_

_ -Sophie_

Explosions can induce and are not good for headaches; may cause concussions. Symptoms include loss of consciousness after event occurs, dizziness, tired and sluggishness, double/blurred vision, headache, and vomiting. Well, damn then. Michael Warren was most likely concussed.

"Thanks, Gusti. Fucker," Mike muttered under his breath, angry. Gusti had made Mike blow up another safe to get to some expensive armor-piercing bullets. Gusti had been smart enough to go outside this time but someone still needed to throw the detonator from the right spot. That unlucky bastard was Mike and this time there was nothing to cover him from the boom waiting to happen. He stood against the metal garage door, head and back pressed firmly to the cool metal. The special agent was aiming to duck and roll out as soon as he threw the mallet at the safe. Of course, he wasn't that fortunate. _I never am _had Mike said to himself.

Lucky enough, he'd thrown the mallet perfectly and the safe had exploded according to plan. However, Mike sneezed as he threw it and therefore couldn't move from his place against the metal garage door before the explosion and was reduced to suffering the harsh force of the blow.

His body was shoved against the metal and he suffered whiplash as his neck whipped his head back to smack into Gusti's shield and cause a flaming flower of pain blossom into the base of Mike's battered skull. Fragments of the walls, dust, and debris rained over him and the safe now sported a hole making the in-tact bullets achievable. Gusti rushed in and didn't even glance at his groaning accomplice before making his way to the merchandise. Mike was collapsed on the floor, sitting in a puddle of dust and infuriating pain.

"Oh yeah, Man! You done it again, yeah? Jack pot! Hey, are you okay? Aye, you'll be yeah, fine, okay? Okay! Walk it off, Mister Stuntman-Coolest-Guy-I-Ever-Met! Okay, yeah woo who!" Gusti's optimistic floated through Mike's hammered ears as he tried to stand. The agent couldn't hear his felon friend very well; there was an aggravating persistent ring in his ears.

"Hey, Mike, I gotta go show Madison! Hey, you have place to go not far away, right? Yeah, you got friend out there to get you, yeah?" Gusti asked. Mike just nodded and stuttered out an answer

"Huh? Ye-yeah. Yeah, Man, I'll be good. You go show her, I'll get out of here fine"

"Okay, Mike! See you later!" Gusti shouted happily as he fled out of the room and got into his car to get to his wife and show her what would soon be their money.

Mike still couldn't move without wincing or groaning. He was injured and in trouble, he knew that. Mike had his phone though; he could call a housemate to come get him. Honestly, he wouldn't be getting anywhere by himself. The fumbling around for his phone that ensued proved to be pointless because when the agent pulled out his phone he found the screen and back smashed beyond reasonable and completely useless. "_Dammit!" _Mike swore which caused a new pierce of pain to flow through his body. He groaned and proceeded to try and stand. Luckily, Mike had his wallet which contained some change in it. He'd need to find a payphone and call someone. Charlie was off today and at the house, she and he had a beautiful unbreakable bond, this would work.

So Mike faced his first battle and stood up haphazardly, gripping a stool nearby to steady against his buckling knees. His head still pounded like a hangover and everything was in doubles and blurry twos. The agent could feel himself losing consciousness and falling, letting go of the table lifeline. Mike's legs gave out and he fell into black colored pain.

When he came to, Mike was very unhappy with the overwhelming sick feeling in his stomach. His neck was in pain which spread to his shoulders. Before he knew what was happening, Mike rolled onto his side and threw up the contents of his stomach. That might've been a side effect of being very close to an explosion in a small place. The ringing was still there and Warren was still dizzy and nauseated, seeing double, and felt a pressure like a heavy weight on his head. He must've only been out for a handful of minutes, five most likely.

Mike still had to leave and call Charlie to take him back to the house where he could think out this case. However, leaving meant standing up and trying to not throw up everywhere. _If I stand up, but I see four feet, which ones do I move? _Mike's concussed mind asked as he tried to reason with himself. Nevertheless, he stood up slowly and breathed heavily trying to lessen the queasiness soaring through his body. There were pins and needles in his feet and hands and it was difficult to focus. Mike momentarily forgot what he was trying to accomplish before cursing himself and hobbling out of the garage.

* * *

Payphones are not incredibly difficult to come across in Los Angles but Mike sure had a hard time finding one in the busy streets. Bumping into many people and stumbling down sidewalks finally led the confused and pained agent to a rusty payphone outside of a gas station after about three miles of walking. Coincidentally, Briggs and Mike had arrested someone there once on a small bust. The memory brought a smile to the agent's face, reminiscing of simple and first cases before the shit hit the fan that was his job. _Focus, _he thought. _Call Charlie. Get someone, dammit!_ With shaking fingers and a foggy mind, Mike called one of his closest and best friends of his entire life: Charlie DeMarco.

Upon figuring out it was her extremely close friend Michael, Charlie was flooded with concern for her young friend. His voice was shaky and some words were slurred and sounded pained. She'd deduced that what happened was while blowing up another safe with Gusti, Mike hadn't had time to cover himself and suffered the impact. He'd hit his head and potentially roughed himself up pretty bad. He did _not, _however, mention that he had blacked out, his neck, head, and shoulders ached-along with the rest of his body-like a bitch, or that he had thrown up.

"Well where in fuck are you, Mikey? Come on, I gotta help you out here!" Mike proceeded to relay his location to Charlie but in the middle he had to stop and throw up some more. He then realized how bad his condition might be, just how bad his heart and neck and stomach ached, and how tired and drowsy he was so he begged Charlie to hurry.

"C'mon, Charlie."

The strain in her housemate's voice sent Charlie over the edge and she rushed to her car and put her phone on speaker to keep Mike sane as she broke a few speed laws to get to him.

* * *

When Charlie finally spotted Mike sitting against the pole of the payphone, hand over stomach with his cerulean eyes closed, she slammed on the brakes. Charlie rushed over to him and quickly engulfed Mike in a hug. With one hand supporting Mike's neck and the other between his shoulder blades, Charlie asked Mike, "What did you do to yourself this time, dammit?" Mike laughed softly but quickly turned his head away from Charlie and threw up a little bit.

"Oh, Mikey, what happened? C'mon, let's go to the house and then we'll go from there," Charlie spoke soothingly as she helped Mike stand up and get to her car. Mike slumped into the passenger seat and groaned. Charlie put a comforting hand onto his shoulder.

"Paige and Briggs are gonna kill me, aren't they? Oh, Charlie, Paige told me to be careful with this case! Shit, they're gonna be pissed," Mike rambled about how Paul and Paige were going to feel about the condition his case put him in. Charlie hushed him and tried her best to offer assurance.

"Mikey, if anything, Paige is going to be ridiculously concerned for you because you seem to be in pretty bad shape. Sure, Briggs might shove some caution into your damn pretty face but he's probably gonna make you take some time off. Don't you worry your pretty little mind, Baby. Focus on not puking in my car, please."

Mike laughed and felt calmer and safer after Charlie's wise words. "I'll do my best, Char."

* * *

Charlie and Mike stopped by the house to get Mike a fake I.D., even though the hospital was fairly familiar with him.

As Charlie was retrieving the fake I.D., Mike was resting on the couch and trying to assuage the pounding in his head. He couldn't even doze off for a bit, the headache too much of a bother. He just took deep breaths and cuddled up to a pillow on the couch with his arm thrown over his face. Mike's position reminded him of how he would lie with Paige after a difficult day, with his head tucked into her neck and her arms wrapping around him to rub little invisible maps on the small of his back and between his shoulder blades, Mike simply felt better in the arms of someone he is in wonderful love with. These thoughts caused him to pull his legs a bit closer to his chest and wrap his arms tighter around the pillow. He was comfortable for about fifteen minutes before Charlie came into the room, awed, and persisted with taking him to an emergency care facility.

While there, he was given some prescribed Ibuprofen (Advil) and Acetaminophen (Tylenol) for "anti-inflammatory" and pain relief for his diagnosed whiplash. He was then told to buy the over-the-counter products, Advil and Tylenol, from the pharmacy to take if he didn't already have the common items. For Mike's concussion, he was given some more Tylenol and told the same things to buy regarding his whiplash treatment. Mike's concussion was a fairly bad one, or at least bad enough to order him off of works for the rest of the day… and then the rest of the week when the doctor and Charlie learned that he'd walked a few miles after being in close proximity of an explosion, blacking out, and throwing up. Needless to say, Mike wasn't _too _torn up about taking a few days off, this case was working him hard and he wanted a little break. He was looking forward to snuggling with Paige despite sporting some injuries.

"Get some rest, young man. Try your best not to strain yourself," The doctor said to Mike as Charlie helped him stand up to go back home. She scoffed and laughed a bit at his caution.

"Yeah, we'll see how well that goes with _this one. _We're going to have to tape you to the bed, huh?" Charlie joked. They both thanked the doctor before walking out and to the car.

"You know everyone's home now, right? You are going to get floundered, Baby," Charlie spoke softly to Mike as he curled up in the passenger seat and closed his eyes. She moved a few stray strands of hair out of his dirty and tired face before running her thumb over his cheek like a mother would. She then rubbed his shoulder and proceeded to start the car and drive back to Graceland.

* * *

As expected, when Mike and Charlie walked into the house together with Mike's arm looped around her shoulder and Charlie's round his waist, all conversations and din stopped while Mike was eased down onto the couch. Briggs was the first to ask, "What the flying fuck, Chuck?" while Paige rushed over to her agent's sleepy figure. Charlie explained only what she knew to Briggs, Johnny, Jakes, and Paige.

"Let's just let him rest and then we'll have dinner. Has he eaten at all today, Charlie?" Briggs asked as Paige sat down my Mike's head and messed with his hair.

"Not since he went to work his case. He did throw up a few times, though."

"Damn, Kid. Okay, sleep a little while we make dinner. Paige, watch over him?" Briggs asked as Charlie explained in more details Mike's injuries to Dale and Johnny. Paige nodded as she walked back into the living room with an ice pack to place onto Mike's neck. She shifted to put Mike's head in her lap and began to play with his limp fingers.

"Hey, Baby. How do you feel?" Paige asked concerned as Mike scrunched his eyes a bit in pain. He only let out a little groan in response. She laughed quietly at that. That conversed quietly for about forty-five minutes; Paige forced Mike to explain as specifically as he could what had happened that day as she carded her fingers through his hair. She held her breath and sighed each time Mike said something he described as painful. Mike also asked her about her day, being a kind boyfriend even in pain and brutally tired. In no time dinner was ready and Paige was rousing her ill boyfriend and helping him to the kitchen. He was just very, very, _very _tired but needed to eat and then take some medication.

Dinner was delicious, as usual, _Thank you, Charlie, _and the house spoke of their days and cases, Mike's was pretty important, and when they all were finished they all went their own ways to do what they needed. Paige didn't need to do anything that night, nor did Charlie, but Briggs talked to Mike before and gave him some well-earned caution and a pat on the back. He then let Mike go to Paige and Charlie. As soon as Mike stumbled into Paige's room Charlie grasped his forearm and helped him to lie on the bed. Paige stood up from her desk and placed herself by Mike. They talked and talked until Charlie deemed it her bedtime and left the lovebirds to rest and heal.

As Mike predicted, he got to snuggle with Paige as she kissed his face and lips. She rested her head on top of the one in her neck as the injured hugged her body tightly. Paige looped her arms around Mike's back and placed her left one on the small of his back and her right between his shoulder blades. Mike's calmness and comfortableness increased dramatically as he drifted to sleep in the arms of his incredible, beautiful, lovable girlfriend, Paige Arkin.

He was no longer seeing double, but each time Mike saw Paige his heart doubled in size. Sure, in the morning he would feel a lot of pain from the events of the day but he didn't need to think about that. Mike wanted to think about the current moment, which was all he needed.


	5. Traditions

_HAIII GUYS! August 5__th__ was my birthday so I didn't update like I planned to but I finished this birthday one-shot up for you all! =) So, I've been working on this story for a while and I made it sort of long for you guys to try and make up for months without a chapter of mine. So, this chapter is dedicated to its requester, __**RosieColes95**__, an awesome reader and fellow author! (Go check her awesome stuff out!) And obviously I'm not Jeff Eastin and this is fiction. Leave prompts in the comments please or my ask box on Tumblr _incaseyouwereasking _Read on, Babes!_

* * *

Mike woke up to smooth fingers padding along his abs and the other hand carding through his hair. Paige knew what day it was so they had their own little celebration last night in his room with some wine and strawberries. _A _great _celebration with amazing company, _he thought to himself as Paige lightly kissed his jaw. She interrupted his thoughts by lightly scratching the old Jangles scar on his abdomen and laughing at him.

"Come on, Levi. Mike, you are not going to just _not _tell anybody in the house that it's your birthday. You're only what, twenty-six today? Here in Graceland when it's someone's birthday we have a few old fashioned traditions! They are the best! And if _you _don't tell anybody I will."

"What about Jakes' birth-"

"Uh-uh-uh! Hold up, that does count because he's Jakes. You can't do shit for him, right? He punched Johnny last year after the bounce house! Anyways, you have to tell the house or else I'm going to run down there-in one of your shirts-and tell everyone that it is Michael Warren's TWENTY-SIXTH BIRTHDAY!" Paige pestered him, nearly shouting the last few words. He couldn't resist her for long though, so he caved pretty easily.

He sighed, "Fine, fine. I do love seeing you in my shirts, though," Mike said as he fumbled with Paige's now blonde hair. I t was much shorter than a few months ago and now almost completely blonde. She is so beautiful; I could compliment her all day. Suddenly Paige's lips were on Mike's but he was startled so this kiss was a bit less romantic. Nonetheless, Mike smiled into it and wrapped his arms around Paige's waist, admiring the smooth edges and curves. With a swift movement Mike had Paige flipped over lying on her back with his strong arms wrapped around her side.

"October twenty-first is going to be interesting," Paige warned as her fellow agent stood up to get ready for the long day awaiting him.

* * *

"Paige, why the hell is October twenty-first a special day?" Charlie scolded Paige as everyone in the house gathered in the kitchen.

"Well, Chuck! Today, our dearest Mikey is turning another year young!" No one spoke. Charlie only glared at Mike.

"How many candles?" Briggs asked quickly in an attempt to distract Charlie's anger.

"Look, guys, it's not really a-"

"Michael Warren, why the hell did you not tell me that it is your fuckin' birthday? I could've cooked you a nice-ass birthday breakfast! It's a tradition!" Charlie spewed angrily at him. Mike glanced at Paige and mouthed _that tradition?_ She just nodded and smiled and mouthed back _One of them! _He quickly felt guilty and tried to assuage Chuck's glare.

"Char, I didn't want to burden you. You've got enough on your plate so I thought I'd let it slide by! I'm sorry, really, but I just thought it'd be better if I didn't tell anyone. But now you know, and Paige told me about some traditions? So I guess I'm game for those but do-

"LEVI! We are gonna have some sick ass fun tonight, Man. P, do you mind me stealin' your man for tonight? We'll bring him back but no way are you two getting down and dirty after our traditions tonight!" Many conversations started at once then.

"_HOW MANY FUCKING CANDLES DO I PUT IN YOUR GOD DAMN BIRTHDAY CAKE, MIKE!?" _Charlie screamed.

"Chuck, let the kid _breathe, _damn it!" Briggs scolded.

"Holy shit, guys. I fucking hate birthdays and this is why."

"Johnny! Mike and I weren't going to do it-" Paige started.

"We weren't?" Mike inquired sadly.

"Sure you weren't! Listen-" Johnny teased but cut short. "Shit, we would've left the house for Mikey to get some! And on his birthday, too? Son, you are lucky as hell to get laid and freaky on your magnificent day of birth!"

"Jakes, I see you lookin' a little green and I feel that. John Boy, stop poking at Mike and Paige's sex life." Briggs argued.

"HEY! WE have some traditions to attend to! First up! Take the celebratory Fuckin' Almost As Good As Birthday Sex Shot!" Jakes said loudly after Johnny reminded him.

"The fuck is in that?" Mike asked intrigued.

"A little bit of this, a little bit of that, and a whole lot of something that'll feel _good_, Hun," Paige said last bit seductively in Mike's ear to mess with him. He thought about it for a second, debated some more, and decided that something by the name of "Fuckin' Almost As Good As Birthday Sex" couldn't be that bad so he obliged. Mixologist Johnny then started dancing around the kitchen madly, grabbing various bottles and a shot glass labeled "It Feels Good" in droopy pink and white letters. The house wasn't lying, the dreamy drink was a little bit of this, that, and then some more and, while it smelled like a tired hangover, looked irresistible.

"Come on, birthday bitch! Take the delicious shit already and feel good," Johnny urged impatiently and for Mike, and that was all it took. Tapping the sexy glass on the table, Mike went bottoms up and downed the intoxicating liquid. Man, did it feel_ good._ Mike felt a stirring in the pit of him stomach and had to grip the glass far too tightly to keep calm and quiet. The agent scrunched up his eyes and shook his head madly, the feeling still floating though him and the aroma settling in his mouth.

"That was great. What now? What are these other traditions?" Mike asked maybe a bit too eagerly.

Briggs started, "Well…"

* * *

Jakes, Johnny, Briggs, and Mike were all dressed up in the most ridiculous outfits they could piece together from the clothes in their theatre themed Costume Room. Tradition Two was everyone picking out each other's attire. Jakes resembled an angry valet/bunny man, Johnny was decked in complete drag makeup, skimpy jeans, and a tight black leather t-shirt, Briggs somehow got into the turquoise tuxedo with a neon yellow tie and pink cat ears headband, and Mike was looking especially dapper in a sleek black suit coat and black vest, white collared long sleeve button up, grey tie, and dress shoes. But his quite special touch was his pants, or rather his short wash-out denim shorts with accents of lace fixed to the hem and pockets.

"I give you, Tradition Three! Ladies, take pictures now, this won't last forever," Johnny commented as Jakes sulked and Paige slid over to Mike. She grabbed his wrist and lugged him away without explanation, and they faintly heard Briggs' infectious laugh as Charlie commented on Tutturo's eyebrows and shirt.

"You know, this suit might be the sexiest thing I've ever seen you in, Michael Warren."

"What about the shorts, huh?"

"I could do without them. Taking them off would be better than changing them, really. Mike, you have no idea how stupid and hot you look," Paige complained as her long fingers found their way to Mike's back pockets and squeezed ever so slightly. Mike would've picked her up and carried her away to do a personal and enjoyable thing, but tradition outweighed heated, sexy birthday sex in this house.

"Paige, I've gotta go in a few minutes."

"I know…" She dragged out.

"A few minutes," he repeated smiling. She smirked and they scampered off for a heated, passionate, and maybe too loud make out session where hands were totally not to themselves.

* * *

"It took you long enough! We thought you'd given up just for a taste of-" Johnny started.

"Let's go, Boys! Birthday doesn't last forever. Briggs, please let's go," Mike said quickly and Paul wasted no time in getting the car and ushering the atrocious men out of the house.

Tradition Four was standing outside of the house in their getups striking sore poses and then a few group pictures and Tradition Five was singing "Never Gonna Give You Up" by Rick Astley, "Don't Stop Believing," by Journey, and other great classics as out of key as possible in the car with windows rolled down.

Tradition Seven was going to be a whirlwind, Mike could already tell. After performing the humiliating Tradition Six of walking up to the pretty female bartender and informing her it was his birthday and he was going all out and hardcore yet asking for lemonade with three slices of lime and no ice and asking for the most obscene food item on the menu while popping his jacket collar, nothing could truly be that bad for his ego. Don't get too excited though, they could still feel supremely bad.

"Tradition Seven, dearest Mikey," Jakes started, "consists of something Paige would not enjoy and we would all pretend we didn't know you for." _Oh shit. _He just hoped it wasn't going to be karaoke or something else with singing. Michael had jinxed himself, however.

"You go up there and you request either anything Brittany Spears, sappy Adele, or Bruce Springsteen's "Jesse's Girl," you're limited pick." Jakes said to him gleefully as Briggs was wingman-ing Johnny.

"Obviously Springsteen, Man. Let's do this!" Mike said with feigned excitement, fake it 'til you make it, as his best friend used to say. He stalked up to the man at the karaoke station, requested his song, and stood center stage. He took a deep breath and began to sing along to one of his personal favorite songs. He was good, _really _good.

"Michael Warren can do many things, and now we can add singing to the list," Dale said cheerily as Mike stepped off. He just smiled and nodded, still on his high from singing in front of the tipsy crowd. He secretly had a history with singing and drama, but that was another embarrassing story for another personal time. His stumble down memory lane was quickly interrupted when Briggs strode over and declared-

"THE EIGHTH TRADITION, Mr. Michael Warren," Briggs started, "is my personal favorite. Now that you're thoroughly embarrassed and a wee bit drunk, we're going back to our haven and your girl. You, however, are going to have to walk in the water up to your knees as soon as we reach the shore. But before that, DJ?"

"You, son of a bitch, are going to jump into the ocean. From the pier, of course." Dale concluded giddily. Mike groaned at that, realizing he'd be freezing and drenched for the entirety of the way home. Putting his face in his hands, Mike let out a wimpy groan and silently begged the question why?

After paying the bill, Johnny- who, despite his current attire, had been chatting up and getting it on with a Betty at the bar _and _had managed to get her number-lead the way to the pier, Michael Warren's doom.

The sprinkles of water were soothing with their crystal chill and speckles of salt. Mike used to call them the tears of the sea creatures when he was a child and would visit the beach with his legal guardian. When she'd skipped over to him the first time he'd called out the claim it'd been because she'd asked him, "Why is the sea so salty, Mikey?" and after thinking about for a good twenty seconds, he and his seven year-old brain came to the creative conclusion: "The sea creatures are sad in the deep sand, so they cry the sea to be able to swim. But since they're tears, the water is _salty_!"

The droplets littered his shirt and golden brown hair, making him detest this birthday tradition even more! Paige would not be happy over this, but at least she knew the drill. It's going to be freezing and terrible and not fun at all but of course, that's what he got for telling his lovely girlfriend, whom he loved so very much and could blame for his up-and-coming hypothermic state, his damn birthday. "Dammit, Paige!" he screamed angrily when the men started counting down from ten.

"Eight, seven, six… FIVE…" they said loudly and started chuckling. _Now or never, _he thought.

"I had to be in shorts-" Mike grumbled.

"Three, two-"

"ONE IS NO FUN!" Mike screeched as he jumped from the wooden planks and into the silky abyss. It was ridiculously and incredibly freezing. "DAMMIT, BRIGGS, YOU SUCK ASS! JOHNNY, JAKES I HATE YOU GUYS SO MUCH RIGHT NOW!" the agent yelped angrily as he struggled to bob his head above the stinging water. It left goosebumps all over his skin, exposed in the lacey denim short and drenched suit; it felt bad and good at the same time and although it burned a bit, he wanted to stay with the feeling. It was just-it was just like Paige's touch.

As Jakes shook his head with a sly grin, Johnny stood next to the laughing Briggs, cackling and whooping himself. Graceland was a serious place filled with people that face defeating, seriously fucked up problems. But if you don't fuck around in life, what's the point? That was part of the reasoning behind creating all the damn traditions.

"So Paige knows I'm going to be soaking wet and might have hypothermia, right? I mean, she's aware I'll be cowering next to the heater?" Mike asked with a slight tremor in his voice as he looked up at his coworkers hopefully. They just nodded at him and pointed him towards the house, where he'd be wading to for the next two miles or so. Wanting to waste no time, Mike proceeded to struggle off towards Graceland.

* * *

Along the way, the agents made small talk and joked about the house, each other, Mike and Paige, traditions and birthdays, but most of all the spoke of their undeniable friendship and comradery that it formed between the agents. "Seeing this fucked up world first hand and then getting to share it with you guys really solidified our friendship, I think," Jakes said giddily as Mike shivered and nodded in agreement.

Alas, they reached the house where Charlie was sitting outside smoking with Paige who drank an icy bottle of beer. Never had he been happier to see his stunning roommates. The ocean was freezing his body, he was sure there were icicles in his hair and hanging from his nose. Upon seeing him, Charlie and Paige started cheering for Mike and making their way towards him, Charlie was even holding a towel while Paige had a blanket slung over her shoulder. Briggs and Jakes informed him that he could get out of the ocean now so he rushed out and ran over to Paige and Charlie. He gave them both a salty hug smelling of ocean and The Drop. Charlie laughed and shoved him away but Paige accepted the hug and announced that they'd made a cake for Mike.

"Let's feast, kids!" Briggs shouted and they all started walking towards the house excited.

* * *

The vanilla and chocolate cake was delicious, as expected. Tradition Ten was a piece of cake in the face, but the frosting was great so Mike didn't mind. Mike blew out the six candles with a grin as everyone sang and cheered. Paige kissed him on the cheek sweetly as Charlie kissed his forehead with maternal love. Jakes gave him a pat on the back while Briggs and Johnny patted gave him brotherly hugs. Mike kept saying thank you over and over and over again because he was so happy and thankful for the people he ended up living with.

Not too long after eating the cake, everyone decided to head to bed as it was nearly three in the morning. Paige kissed Mike's neck and dragged him upstairs by his hands toward his room. Michael Warren was very happy with his twenty-sixth birthday.

Here in this house, everyone loved everyone and holidays were very important, it was one of the only real things the agents were gifted in their complicated lives. If a birthday came up, you bet your ass that they're going to celebrate the shit out of it because that's just what they did. Little things were important in their beloved household. In their castle, their sanctuary, their safety, where their family was, their damn house, their honest walls full of love. In their home.

* * *

_Sick Mike Number Dos will be up before the end of the week, Loves! Thank you for reading! =) _


	6. Off the Couch

_HELLO BABES I LOVE YOU! _Levi _officially has a tad over 2,500 views WHAAAAT THE NOOOOODLES!?11?!/ THANK YOU ALLL SOOOO MUCH FOR READING THESE STORIES I LOVE YOU BABES! Now, down to business; it has been a hot minute, but I started school and got swamped with homework and projects so there's my lame excuse. ALSO! I don't have any requests from you guys and I need them to keep writing this, you know…I mean, this one shot book is a collaboration between me _**and YOU**_**!**__ So I need your help to write it, I don't have drafts waiting to upload because I don't have requests and am lacking inspiration. I started _Levi_ as "Graceland one shots writing for you and requested by you" but there aren't requests from y'all sooo WHAT DO I DO!? Please keep requesting! I need your guys' help! Here is a chapter all of you lovely babes deserve for sticking around and reading. Okay, as always I'm not Jeff Eastin, I'm actually nice, guys, and this is pure fiction from ma brain. _

_Read on, Babes! _

_-Sophie_

* * *

"John-Boy you know the rules, if you get it on using the couch, you also have to get it _off,_" Briggs scolded Johnny jokingly. The following late and stressful night, Johnny had had sex with Hector of Hector's Tacos delightful daughter, Jeannie. She truly was a pretty girl, and Johnny said that she was a good sex partner, but since there are no civilians upstairs they'd Marvin Gaye-d it on the house's beloved couch.

"Johnny, seriously, we can't have this on the couch! This is where we sit and work and enjoy!" Charlie stated as she smacked Tutturo's arm with frustration. The men both just laughed.

"Dammit, Chuck, _I did enjoy! _What about Mike and Paige? They make out at every chance they get; I wouldn't doubt them doing it in the closet, Man! Damn rabbits, Bruh!" John hollered as he scrubbed the cushions.

The couch smelled like sex and affection, the creased seats and folds reminding him of sweat and hushed noises, a kept secret for the night. When he'd lied on his side and Jeannie melded into his abs, her breasts flush against his chest. Her gorgeously tan face was water colored pink and rose gold and her plump lips were now bruised purple and puckered from their lemon sweet kisses. Her short but full legs latched around Johnny's and Jeannie's arms had snaked one way around his waist and the other underneath his arm and around to allow her hand to grasp his shoulder. Johnny's hands innocently wound around her soft, round middle yet one sweetly dipped lower to gently settle over her beautiful butt in a loving manner. Tired, she'd breathed out her last bit of desire onto John's prominent and sharp collarbone; in return, he'd let out his affection into seasoning kisses peppering her ebony and silk chocolate locks. And then, the pair simply fell asleep in the nude together as close as they could muster.

Johnny hadn't even realized that he'd stopped washing the couch until Charlie sprayed water into his glazed eyes. She then stomped away and said something about her "Damn family couch, fucking dammit!"

He was too caught up remembering how it'd felt when his early bird unlatched her angel wings from the branch that he was and ventured into the kitchen. He'd resumed his regular sleep position of on his face, his bare body visibly to anybody lifting up the blanket. It wasn't anybody in the end, it was Paige and Charlie. But they house had gotten a damn good breakfast out of it!

"You like her, don't you?" Briggs inquired softly as Johnny shook the thoughts out of his distracted and yearning mind. His face flushed and he sighed deeply.

"Yeah, Man. Jeannie was just good, you know? In every damn sense of every damn way, Jeannie is good," Johnny nearly whispered.

"I know, Man. I know. You know what, Tutturo? Just go hit the water or something, I got this one," Briggs informed kindly to his fellow agent. The younger stumbled and looked at Briggs surprised, confused.

"You sure, Man? I ain't really busy today, I could clean!" Johnny announced as Briggs just shook his head.

"No, no, Johnny. Don't worry; it'll be off the couch." Johnny thanked Briggs and walked off to try and occupy himself.

Really, Briggs was remembering when Charlie had given the same talk to Lauren in her early days in the house. He'd done the girl a familiar favor, too. Keep it off the couch.

* * *

_Update: I just remembered a request from someone asking for a one shot of the cast going to see Aaron at his 54 Below show and backstage stuff so that is a very real possibility *wink, wink* Okay bye, you Babe!_


End file.
